Victim...Or Victor?

Have you ever felt like a victim? Like circumstances were beyond your control, and you never really stood a chance? Perhaps you have been a victim at some time in your life, a victim of an accident, or a crime, or neglect, or of some form of abuse. Very few of us have not, at some point, been a victim of something, or someone. These experiences leave us with mental, and sometimes physical, scars which we carry with us. The wounds may heal, but the scars remain. How do we move beyond these tragic events in our life, and more importantly, what happens when we don't?

We can't begin to address all the ways in which someone can become a victim, nor will we attempt to. What we will attempt to do is find a way in which we can come to terms with the things which have happened to us, and to free ourselves from the "victim mentality" that causes us to place blame, and to make excuses for our own behavior. When we internalize the negative occurrences in our lives, we give them power over us. Whether it's something someone said, or did, to us, or a tragic event such as the loss of a loved one, we need not allow these things to gain control over our minds. Certainly, with any tragedy, or loss, there is a time of grieving which we must go through. Likewise, with neglect, or abuse, there are long-term effects, and sometimes these situations require counseling, or therapy, in order to begin the healing process. I am in no way attempting to minimize the impact that these events can have on our mental and emotional well-being, I am simply pointing out the fact that we cannot overcome these obstacles on our own. These struggles cannot be dealt with alone, and our best hope for healing comes when we lay our troubles at the feet of the Wonderful Counsellor, Jesus. He alone can provide the cure for all the damage that the world has done to us. 

One of the worst aspects of the internalization of negativity is that it will always come out in other ways. We begin to develop an attitude of bitterness, we lose our patience easily, we lash out, and we may seek to blame others for our own behavior. We will attempt to justify our actions based solely on the premise that "if this had not happened to me, I wouldn't feel this way", or "if they wouldn't act this way, I wouldn't lose my temper". When we attempt to justify ourselves in this way, we are simply making excuses. This is a form of denial. We can't accept the fact that we are responsible for our own emotions, and rather than bring them under subjection, we allow ourselves to lose control. These are all choices which we make, and though they may seem like subconscious choices, they are, in actuality, learned behavior. We lost our temper with someone and they bowed down, we got our way, and we liked it. We blamed someone else for our problems, and we got sympathy, and that felt good. So we kept on doing it...but at what cost?

Do we continue in this victim mentality, or is there an alternative? Is there a way out of this downward spiral of negative thoughts and actions? How can we battle these demons, and what can we do when it seems that we've lost control? 

We can surrender.

We can surrender all that we've done, and all that we are, to Jesus. We can give up on blaming others for our problems, we can quit making excuses, we can stop living in denial, and we can begin to live in VICTORY. 

Jesus has already defeated all the demons that we could ever face, and because of Him, we can have victory. He tells us in John 16:33..."These things have I spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation; but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world." We don't have to feel as though we are alone in this fight, because we have a friend who sticks closer than a brother. We have an advocate, a mediator, One who has promised that He will never leave us, nor forsake us. 1 Corinthians 15:57 says..."...thanks be to God, which giveth us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ."

When we choose to surrender to Jesus, to give Him our all, we choose to be a victor rather than a victim. We begin to take responsibility for our own actions, rather than blaming others. We still fail, but we own it. And we find forgiveness. And we move on. We acknowledge our shortcomings, but more importantly, we acknowledge the One who gives us the strength to overcome them.  Many people are reluctant to surrender to Jesus, to become a Christian, because they feel that they must first be "perfect" before they can give their hearts to God. This is simply not the case. God doesn't want your perfection, He wants to perfect you Himself. The Lord tells us in 2 Corinthians 12:9..."...My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness." And we read in Romans 8:37..."...in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us." We simply have to place our trust in Him, as we read in Proverbs 3:5-6..."Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths." 

Another significant change which takes place in our lives when we surrender to Jesus and choose to live in victory is that we begin to take back our power. So much of our energy is spent, depleted, on blame, denial, and excuses. And when we replace those negative aspects with responsibility, acknowledgement, and accountability, we begin to see positive changes. The energy which once was wasted is now renewed. The toxic emotions that once weighed us down give way to a peace "which passeth all understanding." Ephesians 6:10 tells us to..."...be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might." 

One of the great paradoxes of the Gospel lies in the fact that our surrender to Jesus provides us with freedom. We live in bondage when we live for ourselves. Imprisoned by our own lusts and desires, and held captive by self-indulgence, we forfeit our freedom. We create our own prison, and sentence ourselves to life without parole. However, when we begin to realize the futility of our selfish nature, in contrast with the fullness of heart and peace of mind that Jesus provides, the choice becomes crystal clear. We read in John 8:36..."If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed." What wonderful freedom we experience when we are freed from our sins! What beautiful liberty to be freed from the eternal punishment that our sins would ultimately lead to. Galatians 5:1 tells us to..."Stand fast therefore in the liberty wherewith Christ hath made us free, and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage."

We don't have to be a victim in this life. We don't have to be a victim of this life. We can choose victory. We can choose Jesus. When we are born again, born into His kingdom, we become victorious. And His victory will never fail us. Although we may sometimes lose focus, and become mired down in the cares and concerns of this world, He will always be there to pick us up if we fall. He will renew our strength, revitalize our faith, and restore our right standing. We read in 1 John 5:4..."For whatsoever is born of God overcometh the world: and this is the victory that overcometh the world, even our faith." Our faith in Jesus is our assurance of victory, no matter what this world may throw at us, or how violent the storms of this life may become. Romans 8:31 tells us..."What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us?" Jesus is the Light at the end of our tunnel, He is our Way back home. Jesus is the Truth in a world full of lies. He is our Savior, our Redeemer, our Friend...

He is our Victory.